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KISS
MY TIARA:
How to Rule the World
as a SmartMouth Goddess
by
Susan Jane Gilman
"Because
women should not only rule the world, but have a
blast doing it."
Kiss
My Tiara is smart rules for smart women of all cultures,
sexualities, and sizes! Irreverent, hip—and
laugh-out-loud funny—it's a guide to power
and attitude that offers women an intelligent alternative
to the negative messages we hear everyday from magazines,
television, and relatives. Author Susan Jane Gilman
serves up uncommon wisdom and practical advice on
everything from sex ("Our Booty, Ourselves") to
politics ("Onward, Vixen Soldiers"). She suggests
how to turn shopping into a power tool, how to out-harass
our harassers, and even how to apply man-catching
techniques to salary negotiations. A must-read for
any gal who wants to be master—excuse me—mistress
of her universe.
Chapters
include:
- Beauty
Tips from Mental Institutions
- If
You Can't Order Dessert, You Can't Ask for a
Raise
- Our
Booty, Ourselves
- Every
Idiot We Date is One Less Idiot We Risk Marrying
- Family:
Oy. How to Survive Your Relatives
- Career
Advice and Nail Polish
- Never
Mind a Penis, We'll Take a Bigger Paycheck
-
Give Us That Ol'Time Religion — So We Can
Clobber Sanctimonious Morons with It
- Onward,
Vixen Soldiers!
For example, be a SmartMouth Goddess when it comes
to...
Beauty:
Sure, beauty has the power to excite men. But
so does a box of donuts.
Men:
After seven thousand years of "known" civilization,
guys still seem to have trouble understanding
the word "no." Luckily, there is one word that's
like Guy Kryptonite. That word is "commitment."
Food:
The Jews didn't survive 2,000 years of
persecution drinking wheat grass juice. Neither
will we.
Money:
In the past, feminists condemned Capitalism as
patriarchal and exploitative. Yeah, well. These
women obviously never tried to by tampons in Communist
China in 1986.
Power:
In this day and age, talk alone has the
power to influence our culture. Consider this:
Just a few years ago, the phrase, "You go, Girl"
was exclusive to drag queens and homegirls. Now
80-year-old in Branson, Missouri are calling it
out to each other on Bingo night.
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